MP assaulted by youths

It’s true. I was bleeding from two wounds to my face following a violent encounter with them. The first assailant’s weapon of choice was a metal Thomas the Tank Engine. The second’s was his teeth. Both injuries occurred in the privacy of my own home, accidentally (I think), while I was tickling them. One is four. The ringleader is not yet two. I blame the government.

The victim pictured earlier today
The victim, pictured earlier today

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